Did I really spend $800?

I wanted to game again. But not Magic The Gathering or the like. While those games require a degree of skill, they really come down to whoever can spend the most money on the power cards.

Batman

When walking around my local gaming shop, I came across HeroClix. I hadn’t seen those for ten years or so. HeroClix is a game of collectable miniatures based on comic book characters. I had tried playing them when they first came out, but no one would play against me. They’re more popular now, the shop owner assured me. And they were in the middle of a Batman themed set. So I picked up a pack.

HeroClix are collectable in that the pieces have degrees of rarity randomly in blind packs. Like Magic and other card games, you get a mix of rare, uncommon and common pieces, as well as a chance for super-rare and chase figures. The appeal of HeroClix is that they made versions of each of the main characters. So there were common and uncommon Batman figures as well as rare and chase figures. The appeal was that the common and uncommon, while not as awesome as the chases, were still powerful. You could play with the popular characters without breaking the bank. And there are dice rolls, so luck would be a factor as well as skill.

Mr. Freeze

But it became clear very early on that, like Magic, whoever spent the most money would end up being the winner. Instead of being discouraged, I started buying more and more in hopes of getting better pieces. I’d open pack after pack and get disappointed when I wouldn’t get piece I wanted. And if I managed to get that piece, I’d get beat by a certain piece at the next tournament and have to chase that piece too.

I quickly spent way too much money. The randomness of the pieces is essentially gambling and I was addicted to trying. Like every gambler, I convinced myself I had a system. There is a way to tell, by weight, some of the larger figures. I convinced  this pack had one of the most sought after figures, a oversized vehicle. But to get it, I had to buy that $100 pack. I had the rest of the set, so everything else in that pack would be a duplicate. I put the stupid thing on my credit card and took it home.

It was, of course, not that piece. I was cursing myself for not walking away like my brain told me to. That’s really when I realized I had a problem. I made a vow to stop collecting HeroClix. I gave away most of my set, including some fancy, expensive pieces to keep for causal play.

I still needed a game to play though. The same day I saw the HeroClix, I also saw a game of X-Wing miniatures. I didn’t get it because I wasn’t sure of its popularity. But talking to the other HeroClix players, I found out more than a few were picking it up. So I got a set. And really enjoyed it. It has the strategy element I was looking for and, while expandable, it is not collectable. Every box has the exact same pieces. You cannot outspend, you can only outplay. I’m looking forward to going to my first tournament.     

Getting my Nintendocore on!

Its started rather innocently enough. I was struck with a sudden desire to hear Man or Astroman? Alas, none of my Astroman vinyl made the transition to digital and therefore, unlistenable to at work. I decided to risk it. I would try the Man or Astroman? Pandora station.

Pandora knows nothing about music. It sticks the Misfits on every punk station and Oasis on every grunge station. And mall punk on my beloved Hot Water Music station {Being a music snob is my punk rock birthright. As for the grunge, I got nostalgic for high school. Yep, I'm mega-lame}. So basically Pandora is five minutes of awesomeness with thirty minutes of thumbs down. With ads for reality television shows that makes me weep for this country.

But I had no choice; I need my space surf fix. And as I expected, it was a song or two by Man or Astroman? followed by mediocre old man surf rock. But there was a bright spot. Someone, one of Pandora’s algorithms played something that I had never heard before. Or more accurately, I had heard before but not this way. Pandora, by accident, introduced me to a band was unaware of and it was a GOOD thing.

The magic band that made me temporally stop bad mouthing Pandora was The Advantage. The Advantage {named after the joystick, which I had} was a rock group that did covers of old school Nintendo songs. I remember wasting too much of my life with those tunes. I downloaded the album immediately and had a blast. I’d be listening to them and add the special effects in my head. {Wee-eet. The sound when Mega Man jumps.} I was sad to hear the Advantage only released two albums and itunes only carried on. I don’t like it when people push their nostalgia down my throat so I won’ t push it down yours. If you spent a good chunk of your after-school time 

seeing how far you can take those 30 extra lives, 

you will enjoy this band. If not, no worries.

I decided to press my luck and listen to The Advantage’s Pandora station. Struck out there, crappy metal bands butchering the soundtrack of my childhood. Oh well, at least I found a new band.   

Top Five Darkwing Duck Villains!

Bushroot's Science by SalmaRU

5. Bushroot.

He was more a misunderstood weirdo than an actual criminal, all of his solo crimes were about freeing plants. Now you’re thinking, “Wait a minute, Matt, Megavolt’s crimes were about liberating light bulbs and you thinks he’s lame.” So is Bushroot. But there are two reasons why Bushroot is less lame than Megavolt. First, not one, but two of his episodes had references to the Far Side, a comic strip that I was completely obsessed with at the time. Second, he made a freaking Vampire Potato Monster!!!!

“Hank, get the diesel fuel.”

Tuskernini by Hornstromp

4. Tuskernini

“Ok, Matt, what the heck!?! First Bushroot, then the one-joke character Tuskernini?” Sure, Tuskernini seems like a Friday Afternoon Idea, a drama-king director who commits film related crimes. But he came up with the best evil plot ever, dressing like the other criminals around town and committing crimes. Brilliant.

Danger Danger by Roaming Tigress

3. Steelbeak.

The first one on my list that you will probably agree with me on. Darkwing Duck was originally conceived as a spy show and Steelbeak is a throwback to that time. Suave and debonair, he is the perfect Fleming-esque villain of the series. He should have beaten Darkwing on pure style alone.

2. Negaduck

Evil versions of heroes make great villains. They have the same strengths and know the weaknesses of the hero. Negaduck ruled his own dimension and managed to forge Quackerjack, Megavolt, Bushroot and the Liquidator into an actual threat. He even taunts D.W. by planting crumbs from the biscuits of a certain restaurant at the scene of the crime, so Darkwing would be able to locate Negaduck’s secret lair. He know that Darkwing would be consumed by the smallest details and not notice the giant Negaduck flag he flew.

OUT - Bulba by Frothing Lizard

1. Taurus Bulba.

Darkwing’s first villain and his best. Taurus Bulba was a criminal genius who planned his evil endeavors from jail.  He eventually escaped, by turning the jail into a flying fortress. When Darkwing began to squeeze his plans, Bulba realizes DW’s weakness is his ego, and flashes a willingness to surrender in Morse Code. An underling asks, “What if Darkwing doesn’t know Morse Code?” To which Taurus replies, “He probably sleeps with a boy scout manual under his pillow.” Cut to DW pulling a boy scout manual from behind his pillow to decipher the message.

After his defeat in the pilot, Taurus Bulba is rebuilt as a cyborg by F.O.W.L That's right, like RoboCop but evil!






A huge Thank You to SalmaRU, Hornstromp, Roaming Tigress , and Frothing Lizard! Click on their names to see more of their awesome artwork. 

The Top 5 Albums of 2012 From Bands That Start with M

Like everyone and their mother, I wanted to do a “Best Albums of 2012” list. When I sat down and looked at everything I got last year, I noticed that I bought a disproportionate amount of albums from bands that start with the letter “M.” I jumped for joy, because now I have a gimmick and will stand out from every music journalist with a blogger account by unveiling my

Top 5 Albums of 2012 from M Bands!!!

5. Masked Intruder Masked Intruder 

Silly, borderline-stalker-y, pop punk love songs from a band of anonymous punkers. Probably the most accurate representation of punk love, nerdy guy too scared to talk to girls and invents imaginary romances with them. Despite the somewhat sinister tone of the songs, they are infectiously bouncy and you will be singing the chorus to “Heart Shaped Guitar” out loud, even though the “hero” of that song is about to end up tased in the back of a squad car. All the songs have an Ergs feel to them. Guess that’s why Jaded Punk put Mikey Erg as one of their top suspects in their list of possible Intruders.

4. Mean Jeans On Mars

Another catchy as hell band, this one more Ramonesque. The Mean Jeans don’t do anything different from their previous work, but considering what they play, you don’t want them to. The perfect soundtrack for grilling and chilling.

3. The Mind Spiders Meltdown

Rocking a M in both the band name and the album name, the Mind Spiders also benefit from a singer that starts with an M (Mark) and a chunk of its members are also from a band that that stars with an M (the glorious Marked Men!!!). The Mind Spiders are both like and not like the Marked Men. They’re more organ-y but still awesome-y garage-y. The Mind Spiders RAWK.

2. The Manix Neighborhood Wildlife

The Manix play a style of punk that me and my homies call “Beard Rock.” A bunch songs about how life sucks so lets make tonight kick ass. My life sucks. This band makes it more tolerable.

1. Mixtapes Even on the Worst Nights

Mixtapes play inspiring pop punk. Like makes you want to quit your job and ride a bicycle all day and photocopy zines to leave in Anarchist bookstores and record shops kind of pop punk. When I play them at work, they turn my cubicle into a houseshow with cheap beers and good friends. I heart you, Mixtapes.